How is it possible
That I can feel
Just as isolated
Lonely Worthless Punished
and Burdensome
When I am with you
As when you leave
Me behind?
Whether your face is
Before me with its
Anger Disgust Contempt
or Silent Judgement
as you force a thing
or as you martyr
Yourself
For having to deal
With someone like me.
Would you believe
That I feel just as
Hated Rejected Harmed
Disrespected and Devalued
When you
Take them and you
Leave me?
It's no big deal?
Keep telling yourself
That
As you walk around
The store with the
Family
You always wanted.

An odd place
to give space
to something
I never want(ed)
to speak of -
to think of -
to be.
But it's small here
So maybe not as
Daunting
to give words to the
Haunting
Happening (12 + 24 = ?)
What do I know of
This - anything?
Can I think less?
Deny more?
But that's what
She wanted
Wasn't it?
(It doesn't hurt.)
How would she know
Peek now into my soul
This thing is alive -
The memory's in me
I am worth this (everything)
Processing
Because what happened to me
Is not
Nothing.