When I wake up,
I rock.
Because when I rock
Everything changes.
Because it brings
Me closer
To her.

I like the smoothness
Of the top
Of the railing.
The closefarness of rocking
Until there's no
Crib and I'm falling

Down

       Down

                Down

To the floor where I
CRASH-land.
Head-in-a-bowl.

My inside me is
The most scared.
The scared makes
Me stiff.
Means I don't
Hurt.

A person comes
Picks me up
Carries me away
From her,
Saying,
"You're okay."

They give me a ball.
It's Care Bears.
I usually like it
The smell and the feel
But no.
I don't want it.

Balls won't help.
Balls are nothing.

Crying time is
All done because
New room.
My heart still booms.
I'm still stiff
But it doesn't matter.

I don't rock in cribs
Anymore.

I stay still, still, still
I look at our Big Bird
Lamp,
Our poster with Ernie and
His friends.
And I sing
Inside myself.

I lie.

I wait.

See the crib sides
Tall around me.

I don't rock
Anymore.