I found a piece

A missing piece

One I didn't 

Know was lost

It is peace

And it is context

It is answers

Saved and boxed

Within me,

It grew,

This excitement

And pride

And instead

Of being happy, too,

You're acting

Like I lied

I am here

But I am nowhere

I'm in front of you

I am gone

Your solid ground

Is my iceberg

Slipping

Breaking

Cracking

Freezing

You accepted me

Embraced me

Enfolded me

Adopted me

Or so you said

Because

When next I looked

You were silent

And slowly -

Or not so slowly

At all - 

Solidness gave

Ground lost

Ground weakening

Ground

To a halt

Silence grows

I fade 

In your esteem

I'm a shadow

One you claim

When it's convenient

One you only

Performatively support

Your solid ground

Is no ground at all

And so I drift

'Til I am gone

From your sight

From everything

I thought

Was true

One more loss

One more trauma

One more thing

I thought I had

When all along

Between my hands

There was

Nothing at all.

Are we

Invisible?

Do we matter

To you at all?

These questions

Float around me

Silent alarms

Are sounding

Call us friends

Or don't

You say we matter

But we clearly

Don't

Don't pretend here

Don't claim us

Publicly

When you will

Speak

To everyone

Everywhere

Ever

But us.

Ignore us

When you can't

Use us

Someday

Maybe

You'll lose us.