I am here
But I am nowhere
I'm in front of you
I am gone
Your solid ground
Is my iceberg
Slipping
Breaking
Cracking
Freezing
You accepted me
Embraced me
Enfolded me
Adopted me
Or so you said
Because
When next I looked
You were silent
And slowly -
Or not so slowly
At all -
Solidness gave
Ground lost
Ground weakening
Ground
To a halt
Silence grows
I fade
In your esteem
I'm a shadow
One you claim
When it's convenient
One you only
Performatively support
Your solid ground
Is no ground at all
And so I drift
'Til I am gone
From your sight
From everything
I thought
Was true
One more loss
One more trauma
One more thing
I thought I had
When all along
Between my hands
There was
Nothing at all.
I identify with this poem. I have been diagnosed with depression for many years and talked about being on sensory overload. This is the first time I read it spoken of by other people. I will read more about all of this. Thank you. 🌻
ReplyDeleteHi, thank you so much. I don't get many comments on my poetry so it took me a while to find this one. While not necessarily glad you relate, I'm glad you know you're not alone <3
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